Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Scan Results 10/31/2017

You guys, I don't even know what to say right now, so I just am going to get right to it....

Our little Hazelnut has relapsed again.


To say we are devastated that she relapsed so quickly out of treatment, would be a gross understatement.  But this is the reality of childhood cancer.

Childhood cancer does not discriminate.

Childhood cancer is relentless.

Childhood cancer takes childhoods.

Childhood cancer is murderous.

We knew that this would be a possibility, because once a child relapses with Neuroblastoma, the likelihood of it recurring becomes very high, upwards of 80%.  So it isn't that surprising, but it is still a punch to the gut.

You always hope that it will be your child that will be the odds.  Your child that will not be one of the statistics.  Your child that will beat this thing. 

But the reality is, cancer doesn't care who your child is, how strong they are, or how many people they have surrounding them in prayer and support.

As of right now, we are still waiting for test results to determine the extent of her relapse, and we are going to perform some more tests next week to get a bigger picture of what is going on, so I will keep you updated.

The good news, is that this recurrence, as it is right now, is not urgent.  We were not asked to drop everything and begin treating it immediately.  We have time to study it, and make the best plan we can.  And we have one of the best Neuroblastoma doctors on our side.  Hazel's oncologist, Dr. Marachelian, is not only an incredible physician, but she is also a leading researcher in the Neuroblastoma world, being crucial in some of the most recent advancements.

We will continue to do everything we can to save our daughter, and before anyone comes to me with messages of "miracle cures", please know that we have not left any stone unturned.  She is already using Cannabis Oil and essential oils, we follow an anti-cancer diet, and she takes all kinds of supplements and probiotics.  We still believe these can help her, but if they were going to save her, they would have done so already.

We just humbly ask that you stand by our family, holding us in your thoughts, hearts and prayers, as we try to make the best and some of the most difficult decisions we can for our little girl.

We still have Hope for Hazel, as she has beat this thing twice, and we can believe that she can do it again.  But please pray for our spirits, as it is so easy to lose hope, and to be overcome with fear and bitterness.  I have held onto some of that bitterness, and have even directed it toward God, so I beg you to please hold us up in prayer so that we may see His goodness, His peace, His love.

Until we have more answers next week, we get this week to spend time together as a family, building as many happy memories as we can.  We have not told the children yet, (please, if you see them, do not say anything) as we would like them to have a carefree Halloween.  Although, Hazel, who is too smart for her own good, does already know.  

In true Hazel fashion, she took the news unbelivably well.  She stood up determined, wiped her hands and said, "Okay."  Then on the way home she started jokingly yelling in anger, "Cancer, you get out!  I'm going to punch you and kick you out of there.  No!  I'm going to push so hard, that I'm going to poop you out.  No chemo, just poop you out!"  

She laughed and then said, "Okay, I'm making this too funny now".

I said, "No honey, absolutely not.  You make it as funny as you can.  The best thing we can do right now is stay positive and have hope.  So you make all the jokes you want to, my love."

Last night, I was reminded of something she said on Sunday while we were at the park celebrating my youngest son's 5th birthday.  She breathed in the crisp fall air, looked up to the sky and said, "The world is beautiful today".  And despite this news, my daughter is right, the world is beautiful today and we will hold onto that.

42 comments:

  1. lifting your family up in prayer! <3

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  2. Thinking and praying for your family.

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  3. Praying for sweet Hazel and your family.

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  4. I will continue my daily prayers for Hazel and your entire family. I love this picture of Hazel with the light above her and the ray right next to her. It reminds me that through everything God is right next to her.

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  5. My heart hurts with yours today �� Hazel is truly an amazing little girl. I will continue to hold you all very close in prayer ��

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  6. I have followed your journey for quite some time now. I will continue in prayer and add the requests that you have put here. My heart does ache for you and your little family. God bless you.

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  8. Praying in Jesus Christ of Nazareth name

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  9. You're such a good mom.
    I can't imagine what you and your family have been through. Hazel is such a positive sweetheart and I think that's because she sees your positivity, your faith, your strength... even in those times you think you can't go another minute. Hazel is blessed to have you for her mommy.
    Much love you your precious family. ♥️

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  10. I love you Hazel, I'll pray for you as always!!!!

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  11. ya.... Truly devastating news, my friend once asked me why do you follow all these kids its so sad. Today is sad. But I am a prayer warrior, I will pray and I will fight and you will know your not alone in this. I would want you to fight with me if I had to endure this with my child. God bless you Hazel. We are all praying for you,,,, and God you said you hear us so hear us, through tears I say Heal this child in Jesus name !!!!

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  12. Hugs, love and prayers from Australia 🇦🇺

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  13. My thoughts and prayers are with you through this journey. God is listening and please Lord heal this amazing little girl.

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  14. Prayers for your whole family Lauren. This cancer effects all of you. Tons of hugs��

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  15. Praying for you, sorry you have to go through this again.

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  16. Sending lots of love and prayers for Hazel. Sarah C.O.L.E'S Prayer Team www.colesfoundation.org

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  17. I am praying for Hazel, her siblings, and you and your husband. I'm so sorry.

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  18. Holding Hazel and your family in my heart and prayers and believing always

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  19. May the healers near you give you strenghth and lay their hands upon you,may the angels reassure you with signs no matter what it truly is a beautiful day. May the faithful and unwavering believers wrap their loving warmth around you. In the quiet moments of reflection and prayer, meditation, may the Almighty God console you and renew you and speak solely to you Lauren with a calm voice within and an infinite love. Love,light,path of peace. My darling girl, I love you so.

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  20. I am so very sorry of anotjer punch in the gut you received. We’ve been in a similar fight with Charlotte, who is now 4 years old and has relapsed and had progression of her hepatoblastoma. I am so sorry yet I read and hear hope in your words. Hazel is correct: just push it out! Your words are spot on: childhood cancer does not discriminate; it is relentless; it takes childhoods and it is murderous. I will keep praying for Hazel. I will pray for all the other children we now know because of this awful, despiteful wicked disease. I’m just so sorry.

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  21. Lauren and family...I am so sorry that you are going through this. Its so heartbreaking. we will keep you in our thoughts and prayers...Sandy Wilcher

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  22. Hazel, you and your family are in my prayers. Tania Bishop

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  23. Lovingly Father, please hold Hazel close and heal her body. Mother Mary, please intercede on Hazel's mother's behalf and ask Jesus to spare their family this journey. In Jesus' name, Amen.

    I am praying for Hazel and your family. Stay strong Momma.

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  24. Praying for Hazel and your entire family. Praying for you momma heart too <3

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  25. My heart is very heavy with this news. There are no words that I can say to make it better. I pray that God will give you His strength, and His peace, for ALL of your family, and healing for sweet Hazel.

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  26. Your Hazel sounds like a just lovely little girl.

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  27. Im sitting here crying as I'm reading this. It's not fair that she can't just be a kid. Dear God please make this evil sickness go away from everyone. From one mom to another you are a strong mom. God Bless you and your Family and ease your pain. 😞

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  28. Prayers for your family and Hazel, such a brave fighter. May each and every day be special for her. May God heal and bless her.

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  29. I send you love and strength through this tough time. I send anti cancer, healing, love light and a smile to Miss Hazel.

    I know your pain as a parent. Leukemia stole my son 11/9/09 he was 13.

    Hazel is a fighter. I will be praying for her.

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  30. Many positive thoughts and prayers. Was so hoping for a good report.

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  31. We are praying for you guys - so proud of Hazel and you as a mama. Keep on fighting and know you're not alone on this battlefield - you've got an army beside you, praying for you all and keeping the Hope alive too! Hugs!!

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  32. Big hugs to Hazel and the whole family and we will be praying. I am a mother also and I feel the pain with you.

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  33. I'm praying for Hazel. What an amazing young lady. I do believe in prayer, healing and miracles. Praying for the whole family.

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  34. Our family is keeping you close to our hearts and in our prayers. As a cancer mom, I understand on some levels but the rest of this, I can only stand in solidarity with you and and continuecto send abundant prayers.

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  35. Praying for Hazel and her family

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  37. We would love to gift you a free family photography session when Sweet Hazel feels up to it. We have you in our best thoughts. Ryan & Jay Caliendo info@BurgundyBlue.com

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  38. Sending healing for Hazel!*hugs* I'm so sorry she has relapsed again and hope you get more information soon!*hugs*

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